As manager of our homes, we have many tasks to complete on any given day. However, work grinds to a halt if our attitude is off. When we are irritated or feeling frustrated it is next to impossible to complete even the simplest of tasks. If that describes you, I want to share a few things that may be responsible for the way you are feeling.
Are you doing for others what they can do for themselves?
For some reason, maybe it's habit, we continue to do things for our children that they can absolutely do for themselves. We spend our precious energy running around doing what could easily be done by themselves. Be on guard for areas where you continue to work, because your children will let you.
Are you making your children too dependent on you?
If your children must come to you before they can complete their responsibilities, then you have made them too dependent on you. Put systems in place so that your family has the ability to execute without the added step of coming to you and waiting for you to assist them. If you find yourself unable to complete your responsibilities because you are busy assisting members of the family, it is time to analyze where you can liberate them.
Are you hurting rather than a helping the situation?
Sometimes as a mom, and manager of the home, your attempts to help fail. Maybe you attempt to speed up a process only to confuse the situation. Maybe you step in too soon, when resolution of the issue was just about to happen. Instead of trying to rescue your family from a situation, observe from a distance. When the time is right, then step in, but not too soon.
All three of these are examples of patterns that deplete our power and weaken our influence. Create a powerful moment as a mom and a manager by believing that your family is capable. Equip them to succeed with you and without you. Grow comfortable in waiting patiently for them to ask for your help.
When a mom breaks the cycle that leads to feeling grumpy and tired- that my friends, is a powerful moment!
Your turn, how do you communicate to your family that you believe they are capable?
I have a two year old boy. What kinds of things should I expect him to do for himself? I definitely feel grumpy and tired a lot, but I don’t know if there are things he should be doing, other than picking up his toys? (maybe its also that I have a 6mo. old? If I make it through the first year,it gets better,right?)
Rachael- things get better and tougher all at the same time! It is perfectly normal to feel tired and cranky. You have a little one in your home. They require more from us than we realize. You also have a mobile little one- oh the things they can get in to. Oy!!!! Continue to look for ways to include and challenge your 2 year old to be your little helper. When you are working, give him things to do right along with you. He can do a whole lot more than you think.